Getting married or Moving in together? It will quickly become apparent that you have differing opinions on various issues, and in today's world, it seems like all the preliminary things that were traditionally done when one was contemplating marriage, are simply ignored. So many people may end up in a relationship where important questions were not asked. Important issues like Money, Jobs, Religion, Caretaking for infants, Household chores, grocery shopping, where to holiday, how much to spend on this... and the list goes on.
Every family has a different approach to Conflict Resolution.
-There's the WHAT PROBLEM? THERE IS NO PROBLEM ( Sweep under the Carpet and pretend it doesn't exist).
- Then there is the YES DEAR, WHATEVER YOU SAY, DEAR. Total compliance, The same partner gets his or her way most of the time, until he or she becomes a bit of a dictator, a Hitler, it's their way or the Highway. And the more you give in to them, and don't question them, the more dictatorial they become.
- Then there is the CUT DOWN THE OTHER PERSON AND MAKE THEN FEEL INCOMPETENT, he or she attacks the very self-confidence of his or her partner.
-What others can you list, from your own experience?
And then there are EXPECTATIONS. Child development experts tell us these are formed early on in childhood, they can be formed by the media, TV, friends, and movies.
The inevitable arguments start, and insults are swung back and forth. Families of each partner get drawn into the mess, and more words are exchanged. It's always a bit of a shuffle as new persons move into an existing Family circle. They all have to try and get along with each other. The whole process can be exhausting, and in some cases, can prove to be too much for some family members. The relationship can become so toxic that the parties involved decide to not try anymore, it's just not worth the effort.
Image via Pinterest.
And last but not least, what happens when there is a baby involved? Is it so hard to put aside your individual differences and think about the Baby?
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